Shopper's Addiction

I am the type of person who loves to learn; it doesn't matter how big or small the lesson. Whenever I run across something that I didn't know and I want to learn more about I am excited. Recently, I ran across a website dedicated to a habit that I didn't know is as mainstream of a problem as it is.


Okay, so a few days ago me and my mom were joking around about me needing some sort of shopper's anonymous or something because of a recent online shopping spree I went on. Later on that night I googled shopper's anonymous just for the hell of it not expecting to find anything like that, and to my surprise it actually does exist! I was actually kinda blown away, I mean I knew that there were people out there who have major spending issues (just look at America's current state) but I had no idea that they had their own support network like AA. I just figured that if you had that sort of problem then you went to see a therapist or something on an individual basis. They are technically called under earners and over spenders, shopaholics is a sort of slang term.

Anyways, most girls and women love to shop and spend more than they probably should on stuff that we don't need but the information I found on the site was obviously for people way past what is considered to be the normal amount of wasteful spending. They're called shopaholics because obviously they're addicted to shopping. They are different types like compulsive shoppers (shop to distract feelings; when the going gets tough, the tough go shopping kinda thing), trophy shoppers (find the perfect accessory for outfits, etc. high class items will do), collector shoppers (buys stuff just to have it but it rarely gets used if ever. They just collect the stuff), bargain shoppers (buy stuff they don’t need just because it is a good deal or on sale. Out for the hunt.), bulimic shoppers (buys stuff, brings them home, and then returns them), image shoppers (pick up tab, expensive cars, highly visible stuff), and codependent shoppers (to gain love and approval). The reasons for why they are addicted vary, but from what I can tell from reading through the information, the main ones are that shopaholics are trying to use material things to fill a void, they want excitement and need the adrenaline rush of buying, seeking approval from owning nice things, perfectionism, genuinely compulsive, they have a need to be in control, they have trouble dealing with negative feelings, and they might have emotional issues that carried over from childhood.

What's great is that not only do they have an SA but they have a network for the problem caused by over shopping: Debtors Anonymous (DA). Oh and this addiction affects men as well. I am glad to see that private issues that people used to only really talk about behind closed doors or amongst their friends and family are getting more attention. Nobody should have to deal with any addiction by themselves, it's really true what they say about there always being strength in numbers.

Just Blame It All On Uncle Sam

Everyone wants to point the finger somewhere else when times get hard, especially at the Government. I'll be the first to admit it; the previous Administration fucked a lot of stuff up and were asleep at the wheel on a lot of issues. If they felt something was too tough an issue or they couldn't make money for themselves off of it, then they just threw it to the wayside and ignored it hoping it would go away. No such luck. Now the new Administration has to go to drastic measures to try to salvage what they can of this broken down fiscal American dream.

With all the finger pointing going on, I have to wonder, why aren't we as citizens taking more of the blame? We are so quick to push off everything on 'the man.' Remember this very cliche but also very true saying, when you point the finger, there are always 3 pointing back at you. We were all here nine years ago and we all saw this coming as it drew nearer, but yet we did nothing until it was upon us. Now that there is a real big problem, everyone and their momma has got an interest in politics when it was clear that no one gave a damn about what was transpiring in Washington before this little 'recession.' It's sad that over 500,000 people have to be laid off for people to get off their fat asses and take notice of what's happening around them. People should be ashamed of themselves for not taking more initiative to be alert and demand more from their Government.

America: where more people vote for crap like American Idol than President. We pay attention to everything but what we should. We know all the top football players, who won what Superbowl and when, baseball and soccer this and that, pageant mom shit, clubbing every night, the price of weed and alcohol, rap music and Top Model obsessions, and the list goes on and on. This situation we are in is just a product of the decline of the Protestant work ethic.

No Lie

This morning I found a gray hair in my head of beautiful jet black hair. No lie. I was more than a little freaked out by it at first (true story). But then I remembered that all the older peeps in my family had always told me it is a sign of great wisdom (of course they could have just been saying that because they were all biased by their tons of gray hairs lol). Anyways, I looked on the Internet and it said that a few strands of gray hair in your 20's is normal and that most people start going gray before they are thirty, but that sometimes they just don't notice it until there are considerably more of them. That made me feel good (no sarcasm intended). It's not harmful to my health either from what I read. However, I will still be sure to consult with my physician in a week when I have my check-up. I know, anxiety makes you a hypochondriac. lol.

Cruel Words

Don Imus has stage 2 Prostate Cancer. On March 16, the 68-year-old Imus told his listeners that he believes that it was all the stress that has caused this. It is in fact true that too much stress can be bad for your body in many ways, numerous studies show this and no doctor or psychologist would ever deny that. For example, research shows that women who believe that their lives are stressful, appear to be more susceptible to the cancer-causing virus. That information alone is scary enough, but in regards to prostate cancer, more than 186,000 new cases of prostate cancer are diagnosed each year in America. It's the second leading cause of death for men in America (with approximately 30,000 men dying from it every year). The silver lining in the dark cloud is that if it is detected early enough it is treatable.

However, the real reason behind why I am writing this is blog is because I was pretty upset and shocked to hear some people say that Imus 'deserves' this, and there were even some people that went as far as to say that they are glad this happened to him. I personally am mortified to hear anyone talk like that. No matter what you feel a person has done or said wrong, you have no right to wish any harm on anyone or rejoice at others' misfortunes or downfalls. In a nation where over 553,000 people die of cancers a year, I expected people to show more compassion concerning this issue. I have had loved ones who have battled cancer, as well as loved ones who have loss their battle with it. Most Americans do know someone who has died from cancer. Cancer is horrible and even when you beat it still leaves emotional and physical scars. That is why it was so hard for me to hear these comments.

I guess some people felt that it was okay to say these horrible words because we all know that Don Imus has been in radio for over 30 years saying things that at best are considered controversial. He's a shock jock, that's what he does. He's like Bill O'Reilly, Rush Limbaugh (who some even speculate is working for the Democratic Party because of how bad he hurts the Republican image), and so many others. I take nothing they say seriously so I am not offended by them at all. If you let anything these people say get to you then you really don't understand much about the media, radio personalities, or real politics. The only people ever influenced by these people are ignorant, redneck, back people who are messed up anyways.

With that being said, no one should ever say that to see someone suffering is a good thing. I don't care what you believe about karma or whatever. Words like that are extremely harsh, hurtful, and uncalled for. The people who said this about Imus are 100x lower than animals in my opinion. Even animals are able to show compassion and sympathy for other animals' sufferings.

Never Smoke In Your Eyes

I myslef am not a smoker and never have been (I don't plan on ever being one either). But this idea is pretty smart, a smokeless cigarette. Something out of a futuristic sci-fi film? Nope, a clear reality now. The E-cig, Aeros Smokeless Cigarettes, and the Smart Fixx Smokeless Electric Cigarettes, are among the most well-known, but there are other brands out there. However, all of these cigarettes have the same similar concept. They are already pretty popular Britain, California's Soho, big cities, and in trendy nightclubs across the states. These are pretty great for smokers because now they don't have to go outside to smoke or worry about the dangers of second-hand smoke to the environment or those around them.
These innovative new cigarettes and cigars are approximately 6 inches long and run on a lithium battery-powered atomiser to create harmless vapors that simulate smoke as the end of the cigarette lights up blue or red with each suck. The smoker gets a strong kick of nicotine from the nico-filter cartridge without the dangers of cancer causing tars and other toxins like in traditional cigarettes. They are a little more pricey than your traditional cigs though. The prices range anywhere from $40-$100 per cigarette or per pack (depending on how many a person chooses to buy).
I do feel that they are well worth the investment for smokers. They are not physically harmful to the smoker or anyone else, they are environmentally friendly, and they still offer a nicotine fix. A cigarette that satisfies nicotine cravings without polluting or killing you or anyone else? What more could a considerate, environmentally conscientious smoker of the 21st century ask for?

Marijuana Nothing

I know I am gonna get a lot of backlash for this blog, me being a Democrat and all, but I just don't think legalizing marijuana for mass sale and leisure use is a good idea at all. I have no problem with medicinal marijuana used to treat certain ailments like MS that is prescribed by a real doctor, but anything short of that is a no in my book. People always argue that decriminalizing the use of marijuana would ease some of the problems of enforcing drug laws and save tax payer money, but I believe just the opposite. My senior dissertation is on this topic and the statistics and the health problems of marijuana use are scary. First off, marijuana is a proven gateway drug (means that the use of this drug will lead to the use of harder drugs when a person can no longer attain the same level of high from the gateway drug) and legalizing it for leisure use would open a whole new can of worms as far as drug enforcement goes. And we all see the problems that alcohol has. So now instead of people driving drunk and killing people, they can drive high and kill also:) Wonderful. I hope you speak sarcasm, because it's like my third language. Not only will you have to worry about people driving under the influence of marijuana, but under the influence of other drugs like cocaine once they graduate from marijuana use. Then we'll be spending even more tax payer dollars to build more prisons to hold all these people, and we'll also spend more money on fighting to keep the other drugs that are still illicit off the street and out of the hands of people. If there is one thing I have learned about people, it's that they are never satisfied. Once you give them one thing, they move on to the next. Then 10-15 years down the road we'll be debating whether or not cocaine should be legal. It never ends. Allowing marijuana to be legal and sold in stores like cigarettes (which we all see the health issues that has brought as far as cancer) is a bad idea and gives too much lead way to other possible problems. I don't care if you do collect taxes off of it. The expenses to society way out weigh any possible financial benefits of it.

Rocket Science My ASS

So I read up on a new loop hole in a bill that could possibly result in the extension of the space program past 2010. I am not going to bore you half to death with all the political and bullshit jargon of it, but if it passes then it will create a new avenue to give even more federal money to the program to keep it going past its supposed retirement date of November 2010. I got so pissed when I read this. The simple fact is that space exploration (exploring what I don't know because there is nothing out there worth any value to us humanoids back here on Earth. Just lots of space, space rocks, dust, moons, black holes, and planets not suited to sustain life) program costs America more than $10 billion a year. That is about as much as we spend in Iraq in a month, but still that is money that can go towards more important things, like improving the quality of life on this planet. Spend that money on education, health care, the environment, build better roads, anything but space. Name one way that seeing space and the program has done to help anyone; go on, name one way it has been helpful or contributed anyting to society. I'll give you a few lines worth of time to think............................................................................................ Hint: that's why it's called space; there is nothing but wide open space out there. It seems that man always has to try to know everything, explain everything, see everything and do everything. I think that people at NASA think that if they keep at it they will discover heaven or something. Their like the people from the Bible story of the Tower of Babel. Pride leads us down a road where we think we can do absolutely anything and become greater and more skilled than God. It's like we believe everything in the universe is our for the taking. Newsflash: it doesn't work that way. I really hope the Obama Administration stepsup and puts an end to the program once and for all.

Some Days You Just Can't Catch a Break

I always try so hard and have to deal with so much and it seems to never be good enough. I always come up short. As a result of me feeling this way (and probably the anxiety too), it doesn't take much to upset me, put me in a pissy mood, or ruin my day. I am working on getting better, but as you know like with anything else, change doesn't come overnight. Today, I woke up late ( I swear I can sleep for 9 hours straight and still wake up dog tired...), I had to take a shower but my dad was in his bathroom showering (yet another draw back of living with your family) and he always gets super pissed when someone else takes a shower at the same time as him because it runs out all the hot water quicker...he says since he's the only the one in the family who works 12-15 hour days, he shouldn't have to take a cold shower; which I can kinda understand but it still sucks none the less because it ran me even later than I already was.

I rushed around like a mad woman trying to get everything done so I could get out of the house. I had to ask my little sister (whose 17 years old) to fix me a bagel again this morning (which she of course bitched about even though she doesn't go to school or work). I finally get on the road and I had all the wonderful luck of getting stuck behind all the slow moving vehicles and school buses....*insert big fake smile here* I get to school and I just miss attendance (yes, my college must be the only one on the planet who takes attendance and cares about tardies and absents. It's a small Christian school of about 3,000 students if that helps to draw a clearer picture for you). by 30 seconds because I had to drive around the damn parking lot four effing times before I found a spot!

I know a tardy isn't the end of the world but I fought so hard to get here on time and I have so many tardies since I live an hour away from college and drive all the way here for class everyday...I sure won't miss that when I graduate lol. I was so pissed that I got up out of my seat after less than two minutes in the class and went out in the hallway and cried...only for about 3 minutes but the fact that I cried at all where people could see me shows the state of mind I am in. I just always feel so broken and down and like nothing I do counts for anything. I then pulled myself together enough to walk out of the building and come across campus to Harrison Rhodes computer lab, which is where I am sitting typing this. On the bright side, I did get to print out some articles I needed for another one of my classes later today. Well, I guess I should log out of here and go back to class and try to learn something the last 30minutes of the class...there is a test this Friday... I have been getting B's on all the tests and A's and B's on all the pop quizzes so I am not too worried.

Movin' On Up

I just finished watching the President's News Conference, and he was asked some hard questions about very real and pressing issues. He handled them very well and answered superbly. He is such an articulate speaker and very intelligent. Some of the questions he was asked were about his feelings on the Mexican Border and drug cartel issue, the future of the national deficit, AIG, Veteran's Affairs, his moral feelings on stem cell research, race, Israel and Palestine, and the sacrifices of the American people during this time of economic crisis.

President Obama, along with Secretary of State Clinton, and President Calderon (Mexico's President) are working closely to try to solve the issue of drugs crossing the border. President Obama is scheduled to meet with President Calderon next month. President Obama said that the President of Mexico is working hard to combat the drug lords and make sure that drugs from Mexico don't cross the border into America. However, at the same time, President Obama said that the U.S. has a responsibility to make sure that illegal guns and cash don't make it back over the border into Mexico because that's what helps to fund Mexican drug operations.

President Obama's stance on the future of the national deficit is that his budget will cut the national deficit in half within the next couple of years of its implementation. He acknowledged the fact that the budget will have to be tweaked as situations call for it, and that along with other factors like the creation of more jobs, better access to higher education, and health care reform, the deficit will continue to decrease. Obama also spoke about the AIG issue and said that the reason the Federal Government hasn't done more with the situation, like taking over AIG, is because AIG is not under FDIC so the Government's jurisdiction over it is limited. This is why President Obama and Treasury Secretary Geithner were asking for more authority over private financial institutions that have so much riding on their stability. When questioned by a reporter (rather rudely) about why the White House didn't speak on the matter as soon as they found out about it, he calmly stated he likes to know what he's talking about before he speaks. He wanted to get all the facts in and evaluate them before making an official statement.

The President is making the Office of Veteran's Affairs a main priority. He said that for too long the VA office has had to operate with little resources which have made it almost impossible for it to operate at the level of efficiency it needs to. The treatment of those who defend our country and freedom is not something to take lightly and restructuring of the VA is a main priority. Obama addressed stem cell research and he said that issues like stem cell research and abortion weigh heavily on him morally as it does with many people. He made it clear that he always takes morals and ethics into consideration before signing a bill. However, he said we as a nation have the ability to advance science to help cure diseases in a responsible way and still be morally correct.

President Obama said that in regards to race, he feels that now the American people are judging him on what he should be judged on, which is his performance in this crucial time. He mentioned that on the day of his inauguration and leading up to it, there was plenty emphasis put on the historic significance of his accomplishment as President when you take America's searing history of racial discrimination into account. He said that it shows how far our nation has come and now we need to focus on the main tasks at hand like the economy.

The President acknowledged the fact the American people have sacrificed and continue to sacrifice in this time of economic crisis. He reminded us to at the same time, not give up too much. We still need to look at the greater picture and continue to contribute to our communities and volunteer. He also spoke of his commitment to create new jobs and save existing jobs so that no more people have lose their homes and that those who are already out on the street can get back on their feet. In regards to the Palestine and Israel conflict, he said that the goal is to help both countries create and maintain security. President Obama also said that persistence is the key to any sort of advancement abroad and or at home, and that persistence will continue to be a key staple of his Presidency.

In my opinion, this was a very successful press conference and the President was very open and forthcoming with the American people and media.

Talk About Coincidence!

AIG execs who stole more than $50 million in bonuses have given the money back today. Let's hope we can recover the other $30 million. Sadly, there was over $100 million in tax payer money that was sent overseas that America has no jurisdiction over:/ But at least the CEO's giving back the money sets a good example to others. I am praying that the overseas CEO's and investors give back what they owe to us too.

AIG Uproar

Some top executives of AIG, the finance advising group that has recently come under fire for awarding tens of millions of dollars in bonuses to its top executives from federal bailout money that it received from the government, got quite a surprise this past weekend as protesters representing middle and working class families protested outside the mansions of these 'top' executives. The protesters were urging the thieving CEO's who received a portion of the bailout money to do more to help struggling families. The New York based American International Group, has received over $180 billion in federal bailout money and is approximately 80% owned by the government, but is still struggling due to mismanagement of funds. I think CEO's who took these big bonuses should have to pay back all that they were 'awarded.' If they can not pay it back then they should be jailed the same as people who are found guilty of embezzlement and grand theft or larceny are. After all, those are the crimes that these people are committing. It's really sad when white collar criminals are above the law just because they have money (which they obtained from stealing).

Bowl You Over

I see the President had to apologize for his harmless joke the other night on Leno. That's super lame. People get so damn bent out of shape over the littlest things; very over dramatic. It's obvious he didn't mean anything bad or wrong by it. It was just in harmless fun. You can tell on the video as soon as he said it he wished he could take it back because he knew he would be apologizing for it later. First, people say they want a President who acts just like a regular guy, then when they get their wish, they stone him for being just a regular person. That's how regular people joke. He has people who are upset that he is President (either because he's Black or their just bitter McCain isn't in the White House) ready to jump on him about any little thing so he really can't win. Now, there are people saying that the President shouldn't go on talk shows. Doing media and press is part of the job.

He has to be able to show that he's personable and interested in talking to people, so that is a null argument. I can't tell you how many top politicians and candidates I have seen on shows like the Colbert Report and nobody says anything. Not only did he have to apologize because of the 'outrage' but he invited some special Olympic bowler who bowls a 300 almost every game to come to the White House and bowl with him in order to pacify the people who were offended by his comment, and it worked. Our President is trying to bail us out of Bankruptcy and we want him to watch what he says on a damn late night talk show and then waste time bowling with a down syndrome man in the White House...seriously...coming from a nation of people who can't figure out how pay their bills?!

They All Want A Piece of You

As much as I try to stay away from blogging about Hollywood and the lifestyle, it is sometimes necessary in order to really prove a point. I was reading about the recent accidental and tragic death of actress Natasha Richardson; when I read where it says that she refused a cautionary trip to the hospital because for one, she thought she was okay, and two, because she didn't want to deal with the press and paparazzi that would inevitably get ahold to the story. She wanted to maintain her privacy. A fall while skiing is usually no big deal, but when you're famous, everything is front page news and up for scrutiny in tabloids and papers and Internet gossip all around the country and even the world.

Princess Diana was hounded by photogs and media 24/7, and was eventually chased down by moped-riding paparaazzi in her chauffered Mercedes which ultimately led to her untimely death. We all remember the whole media Circus (no pun intended) surrounding Britney Spears for that whole 3 years or so while she was going through a rough patch in her life. She was constantly videotaped and photographed and always in an unflattering way. We were watching the downward spiral of someone's life from the comfort of our own homes like it was a bad movie or something. It was really sad and horrifying to see the lengths that the paparazzi would go to just to get some quick cash off of this poor lady's misfortunes. It was like a sick game; it's like they were thinking "let's wait and see what she'll do next, if she'll finally break tomorrow, maybe we can push her over the edge again and video another freak out to post up on TMZ and sell photos of it." It really disturbing to say the least.

They didn't care she was hurting, broken, and needed help. They were watching tragedy unfold in front of them while helping to spread the news of it around the world, and all they cared about was their payoff from it. They didn't see Ms. Spears as a human or an equal to them...they saw her as a potential moneymaker for them and because of that they felt it was alright that she be exploited for the gain of others. We watched it as source of entertainment, interesting news, Hollywood gossip, etc., but to Spears, it was her actual real life nightmare. She was living through all of that.

And of course it's not just Britney that has fallen prey to the merciless media and paparazzi, it's a part of Hollywood life for most celebrities. They take all these extra precautions to do things in secret and maintain privacy during family events like births of children, weddings, funerals,etc. They get chased down the road while their driving their vehicles, they get followed and stalked by photogs while they go out for coffee or for a jog, they sometimes get heckled and taunted on the street by these people, they are constantly under the lens of a camera. Who deserves to live life like a fish in a glass bowl? Is that the price they have to pay for following their dreams? They can't live like a real person. It makes you wonder, why do we envy them? They probably wish they were not a celebrity as much or more as some typical person might wish they were famous.

Sadly, it seems that paparazzi and the media have no limits or rules they have to adhere to concerning celebrities' privacy. It's like their free game. And when a celebrity does decide to try to fight back or stand up for themselves, the courts don't back them enough and sometimes they can even find themselves landing in trouble because of it. Freedom of the press is what always gets cited. That's not fair. 'Freedom' doesn't mean you can take away the rights of another and their freedom of movement and to live life. Celebrities' personal lives are not public property as some suggest. They are regular people just like everyone else who just happen to have more money than the average person and have a lot more people know their face. If I was on a TV show or something they would be calling me a star. They put their pants on one leg at a time just like you do and they deserve the same privacy and respect as your average joe nobody.

And As I think more and more about Ms. Richardson' s death, I can't help but wonder, did the papparazzi claim yet another life?

Time is A'wasting!

It constantly seems like I have no time to do...well, anything. School work and papers and job interviews and everything else have totally monopolized my life. It seems I don't have enough time to do what I want and enjoy doing. :( That really sucks. I just want to be able to relax and go out and have fun and not have to have anxiety about what I should be doing. You know what I mean? There is never truly any down time. I'm made to feel guilty when I take time out for me. That's not fair.

OMGosh!! Summer '09 Baby!

It's official, I am going to D.C. to intern! I got the call today. I am going to actually live and work in the nation's capital! I still can't believe it. This has always been one of my dreams since as long as I can remember and it's finally going to happen...all I can say is that God is amazing. I am so blessed. The apartment I will be staying in is so, upscale. I was surprised by that. I figured that just the internship was already such an amazing opportunity that it couldn't get any better, and that I would just be staying in some rinky dink apartment complex, but that is clearly not the case. These are condos and very nice ones at that. It's got an outdoor pool and tennis courts:) It also has glass on the outside and 6 floors. I should find out my internship placement tomorrow or the day after. I am really hoping for the EPA (Environmental Protection Agency) or the Dept. of Homeland Security.

Of course, if I don't like what they have to offer me in the Federal Government area, I could always defer my internship term until the August-January period to see if I can get something better that go around, but I think I would much rather go during the 10 week program during the summer. Summers can get kinda monotonous sometimes so I would like to spend this one doing something really exciting and meaningfully. This could also lead to a full time job but I am not really thinking that far ahead at this point. I just want to go and learn all I can and do the best I can while having fun too. Most people don't ever get an opportunity like this so I truly am thankful for this chance. <3

RRRRR!!

I just had to set up a new twitter cause the other one went wonky...sucks. And the website is still effing up! I tell ya, these little social sites...sometimes it's like why even bother with them? But anyways, hit me up: www.twitter.com/blogbabygabby.

WHATEVER

Another thing that really irks me is how St. Patrick's Day is a real, honest religious holiday and it has meaning, but here in the good old-fashioned, ignorant ass America-it's just another excuse for people to get drunk. *Sigh*

MOVING ON

I also have been bugging out about how much Conservatives and GOP have been in the news lately. The are just sounding off and trying to make a scene. When will people see? With all the recent stuff with Rush Limbaugh and all, they're practically a joke. It's no wonder they loss the election.

ANYWAYS

I am so. sick. of hearing about the Octomom. She is a nobody. What she did was stupid and irresponsible. She should not be praised for it, made a celebrity for it, or bought gifts for it. Taxpayers are already paying for her ignorant ass so give it a rest people. Now, that's all I am going to say about that.

<3

Just got off the phone with mi BFF. I love talking to B. She always cheers me up. I can't wait til she comes to visit for my graduation:] We are gonna have too much fun for own good, like always lol. I can always confide in her and talk to her about anything whether it be guys, my future career plans, or my past. she knows the meaning of LOYALTY which is something hard to find these days. She's a true ride or die badass bitch. That last really bad fight with Tami just proves that loyalty is something most people lack. That whole Tami incident really hurt me because I did nothing wrong and she did pretty close to everything wrong. What really sucks is she doesn't even care how much she hurt me. That is how you know that that is really who she is: a selfish and heartless little bitch. The one good thing about it was that it made me appreciate my true friends that much more and made me realize what a rare treasure they are. Well anyways, I am trying to move past negativity and decrease stress in my life, so I am not going to harper on that anymore. Now I am beginning to get tired which hopefully means bedtime is just around the corner. One last time, B you're the best girlie. 3 cheers for B.

Ciao,
Gabby

Meet Your Match Via the Internet?

How do you find Mr. Right or Mrs. Right? Is it by chance? Luck? Fate? Is it a prayer that has to be answered by God? Can you find him or her on your own by hard work, perseverance (you definitely need this quality in the dating world), or an extreme dedication to the cause? I have wondered about the answer to this question many times (as do most single people). I know there has got be somebody out there for me. I believe there is someone for everyone. I mean if serial killers in jail can find people to fall in love with them and marry them behind bars....a normal gal like me has to have a chance right?! I know there is somebody for everybody, but I don't exactly know if I believe that there is only that one person for every individual.

I think that there are many people for everyone. There are lots of people out there who a person can be compatible with in my opinion. The tricky part is finding one of those maybe 300 people in a world full of over 6.7 billion people. Never less, it can be done. I've seen it. I think that the Internet has really opened up a lot of doors for people in this area. It is possible for a person to live in Turkey and fall in love with someone who lives in Montana, without either of them having to ever leave their house (providing they both have Internet access in their homes ofcourse). People who would have most likely never run across each other in their lifetime now have a shot at a life together. It's really amazing when you think about it. I know tons of people who have met over the Internet. Some couples worked, others didn't.

Talking over Myspace or an online chatting site is definitely easier than trying to get the conversation rolling on a blind or first date.There are, however, some things to watch out for like schemers, fakes, people who are married with five children but pretend to be single on the computer, people who post pictures of supermodels or older pictures of them before the beer gut and make you think that they look that way, etc. You would probably want to run a background check on the person before you decide to meet with them person to person to help you eliminate some of these concerns and any others you might have. I have met a boy over Myspace once...twice actually. Neither one worked out romantically but they are pretty cool people. Well anyways, the point I am trying to make is that even though it does have risks like any other method of dating, the Internet seems to be one of the most promising ways to meet people in this huge, high paced world we live in.

FDA getting an Upgrade

The President has announced there will be new leadership and other changes made to ensure the safety of the U.S. Food Supply. As evident with the recent peanut salmonella outbreaks (which actually claimed the life of nine individuals), spinach scare, and tainted meat problems, the Bush-era allowed the American standard of food safety to decline. During Bush's time in office he allowed food and drug manufacturers to cut corners in order to make a bigger profit. President Obama said that the Bush Administration created a hazard to public health that is unacceptable and it really is. They ignored the worsening of food safety and had the Food & Drug Administration running like a highly ineffective politicized bureaucracy.

The FDA often lacked the financial support and personnel they needed to do their job effectively. I guess that while George W. was busy chasing down WMD's in Iraq that didn't exist and funding CEO's pay bonuses, our nation's food supply safety slipped through the cracks. I am glad to see that making sure that the foods America consumes and the medications that we depend on to keep us healthy are safe is going to finally be a top priority. What most people don't know is that about 93% of America's 150,000 food processing plants go without inspection each year. That personally makes me more than a little nauseous.

This week the President appointed former New York City health chief Margaret Hamburg to be the new FDA Commissioner. Joshua Sharfstein, Boston Health Commissioner is her deputy. Hamburg as well as Sharfstaein, have an outstanding reputation and a history of top performance. I am so happy about their appointment. As an American who both eats and takes medication, I would like to not have to worry about either my peanut butter sandwich or buspirone making me ill or in worst case scenario, doing me in. I actually do worry about these kinds of things when I go to the supermarket or when my doctor writes me a new prescription and I know it's not just my anxiety disorder that causes me to worry. I buy my beef from a certain supermarket because they have a higher standard when they buy and process. I buy my poultry and dairy products from another, and finally I go cross town for veggies.

I know that I am not the only one who feels this way because I have talked to other people who said they do similar things to try to ensure that their families are kept safe. Wouldn't it be grand if there was a set national standard made into a mandatory law that all meat manufacturers cut and process their meat the same, that all farmers use the least harmful chemicals in the growing of their food, and that all dairy products have to be pasteurized? I would love that and I really feel that Obama's announcements regarding the FDA and his plans to improve it and restore public confidence in the food and medicines we use are the first steps to that end result.

F is For Failure

What are your feelings on failing schools? Have you been a student at one? Worked at one before? Would you send your kids own kids to them? What if you didn't have a choice? Imagine that you're a poor, hard-working parent that lives in a low-income urban area where the overall math proficiency rate for the entire public school system is 36%, and the reading proficiency is hardly better at 39%. What do you do? You have dreams of your child being able to attend college and have a chance to learn and participate in all the great extracurricular activities that children who go to good schools do.

However, you obviously are at the bottom of the economic class system in America so you don't have the money to pay to send your child to the great private and religious schools on the other side of town. Now imagine that Congress passes a school-choice program that allows financial vouchers to be given to low-income children so they can leave their failing school and attend a school that is up to par and can give them a shot at a better future. You are elated right? Finally all your prayers have been answered. You get to send your child to receive the good education that they deserve. Now imagine that four years later, the program that has allowed your child to grow in leaps and bounds scholastically, is cut and now your child must return to the very failing school that he or she left behind. You would undoubtedly be crushed.

This situation is a reality for the parents of about 2,000 D.C. school children. Despite the $100 billion that was allocated to education from the economic stimulus, On March 11, 2009, an amendment to continue the Washington, D.C. Scholarship Program was defeated in the Senate 58-39. After the 2009-2010 school year is up this program will no longer exist. It is unlikely that it will be renewed when it's term is up, because along with some members of Congress, public schools, teacher unions, as well as some civil liberties groups oppose the vouchers for various reasons. Public schools and teacher unions don't want them because they compete with their monopoly system. They say the vouchers threaten to undermine the public school system. The public schools in D.C. are a failure despite all the efforts over the past decade to help raise the academic achievement levels.

Civil liberties group don't like how tax payer dollars are going to help send some children to religious schools. And even though President Obama and D.C. mayor Adrian Fenty said that they think children already in the program should be able to stay at the charter or private schools that they are already at until they graduate from high school; the chances of that happening are as unlikely as the program itself being renewed.

I am extremely disappointed in Congress. I think it is so unfair to send these children back to fail. It's like giving up on them...it IS giving up on them. I know that there are more than just 2,000 children in the public school system there and that all children deserve an opportunity at a good education but it seems extra cruel to remove from the failing schools the children whose families you feel are least likely to ever be able to afford to send them to a good school just to send them back to the same grade F system. I really hope between now and 2010 someone on Capitol Hill wakes up does something to reverse these children's fate.

50 First Days

Despite what top economists say, I believe that President Obama's first 50 days in office have been a huge success. I didn't say a perfect success, but a huge success. People need to understand that we didn't get in this situation overnight so we can't expect the President to be able to wave a magic wand and be able to fix everything over night. He's not Jesus people. I think Americans had this unreal expectation that Obama was going to ride into the Oval Office on a white horse and be able to help America rise out of the ashes like the Phoenix in the first month of his Presidency. Not so. However, in just the little bit of time he has been in office he has outlined and passed an economic stimulus plan. He did keep his promise that he would act swiftly on the economy; so he's on the right track. To the people who voted for him, you put the man in office so now trust him to do his job. I can understand people being a little skeptical of the president's Stimulus Package but give it a chance. At this point anything has to be better than just sitting back and waiting for things to get worse which is what Republicans would like to do. Note to conservatives: Things don't just fix themselves.

Non-Attraction Reaction

What do you do when sparks just don't fly? I know that most, if not all of us, have had some experience where they met someone and the other person wanted more than to just be friends and you just weren't interested. Also, many of us have been that person who desperately wanted a relationship to progress into something else and the person we were pursuing just didn't feel the same way about us. No matter what end you are on it sucks either way.

It is hard to tell someone who really likes you that you don't feel the same about them. It's even harder to have to hear it. It can be devastating and heartbreaking. There are books out there like He's Just Not That Into You by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, that tell readers what 'signs' to look for when a person isn't feeling the same about you as you feel about them. These types of books sell thousands of copies because no one wants to be that person who has to feel the stinging pain and embarrassment of being rejected by someone you really like or even love. However, if you are very active in the dating world and out there on the prowl for that special someone, it is almost inevitable that you will be that person at least once. Fortunately, there have been numerous self-help books written on how to deal with heartbreak when it's you that has to hear that you're not what someone is looking for in a companion.

Sadly, very little seems to exist on how to deal when it's you being pursued and you are not feeling the same chemistry as your pursuer. I guess writers and psychologists assume this is the easier situation and there's no need for it to be explained, because in this scenario you're not the one who has to get over the heartbreak; that's someone else's hurdle. I guess you're just supposed to call the person up, shoot them a text, or meet them after hours for a beer and say something like, "Hunnie, you are a great gal/guy, but I just don't want the same thing for us as you do."

The truth is, letting someone down easy (or as easy as possible) is just as touchy a subject. It can be very hard to tell someone who you think is a great person and all but you just don't want to be their boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, etc. Knowing that you have to tell someone this can even cause anxiety and feelings of guilt. I think that it comes natural to most people to want to be nice and not be that jerk who has to hurt someone else's feelings. BUT at the same time, you don't deserve to be unhappy or uncomfortable either. There is only one thing to do: you have to tell them, and soon. The longer a person puts it off and procrastinates and drags out a situation like this, the worse the end result will be. The problem is that most people don't follow this rule. The average person will see that someone is more interested in them than they are the other person and will string them along for awhile, either intentionally or unintentionally.

This makes the situation even worse, because when you do finally tell them you may have ruined all chances of the two of you being friends or even cordial acquaintances. It's true that busted egos, broken hearts, and torn and tattered friendships have always been possible casualties when relationships don't work out or go wrong, but at the end of the day, the goal is to be able to sleep easy at night knowing you did all you could to make the other person's burden as light as possible.

Play That One Back

Got an interview tomorrow with the social security office in Port Orange. Don't know if I'mma go or not because I really don't wanna stay in Volusia after graduation. Keke says I should give it a try though so at least I'll have the option, so I might. Idk.

Today was kinda strenuous and strange. Anxiety flare up. Nuff said.

Had a fight with my younger sis...whatever.

I realized today how much it sucks to have my bestie live in another state. Really would have liked to have her here for moral support and a shoulder to lean on. I guess going through stuff alone makes you that much stronger; maybe. IDK about that either.

Back hurts. I am gonna lie down soon. Not much else to talk about. I'll write some more political blogs tomorrow prolly.


goodnight

I'd Like A #10 Please With A Side of 911

So, I am sitting her writing this while I am eating my McDonald's chicken nuggets and it reminded me of a funny but sad story I read earlier. A lady actually called 911 because a McDonald's didn't give her her chicken mcnuggets...no lie. What's even sadder is that she actually thought it qualified as an emergency. She argued a crime was being committed against her lol. Of course she was fined for inappropriately using the already very overworked emergency service. The fast food restaurant manager said that they realized that they were out of nuggets after the woman had already paid and reached the pick-up window. He said he told the woman the bad news and that the restaurant would be more than happy to give her an order than was comparable in price to the nugget meal she had already paid for, but apparently that wasn't good enough for the 27 year old Fort Pierce woman; so she went ballistic.

The story's link is below. Enjoy=-)

http://www.fox19.com/Global/story.asp?S=9938419

Write Your Own Ticket

I am getting a little nervous as graduation is inching closer. Don't get me wrong, I am excited no doubt. I mean I have worked 3 1/2 long years on this degree and I couldn't be more proud of myself for accomplishing something that only about 30% of Americans do...get a college education. I am just a little nervous about exactly what path it is that I should take after college. I have two internships in D.C. coming up in the summer, which one may lead to a full-time position, an interview with the Social Security office in Port Orange this Thursday, grad school is still an option, and I am also looking to move out soon from under my parents' roof. I am kinda overwhelmed....ok, I am overwhelmed. I am one of those people who thinks about tomorrow like I think about now. I am always trying to look ahead to be ready for whatever is next. But what do you do when you're really not sure what's next?! I have just settled on the fact that I am going to have to pray and ask God to guide me and wait on him to answer. Asking God to show you the way isn't the hard part, however, waiting on him to answer is.

Just Listen To Me, Please

And sometimes, I just feel like I am never gonna make it.
I figure all the years of abuse, hurtful words, and failures are finally catching up to me.
I feel so out of place and out of hope.
I regret so much and am angry so often.
I have little hope and my faith dwindling.
I feel trapped and like all my energy has been

And I just wonder what the hell am I supposed to do?!
I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired.
It's like nothing is ever going to change or get better.
It's like someone has painted my world in different colors and it will never look normal again.
I fear I will never be normal again.

I'm hurting.
It seems I'm always hurting.
I'm never good enough or bright enough.
I never smile enough.
When was I happy? I have been broken for so long.
It seems that my tears have become my lullaby that gets me to sleep at night.

Does anyone hear me?
Do they even care?
Do they see the pain I'm in?
Why doesn't anyone care for me like I care for them?
Where's my promise and my help?
I'm always shouting at myself.

I feel like I am missing a huge part of me and I don't know how to find it or if I ever will.
When will I get the love and help that I so desperately need?
I have been on this road alone for far too long.
I have traveled far but there is still so far to go.
I need someone to help lift me up because I can't do this alone any longer.
Someone needs to help me fly again.

I guess I just have to keep fighting and try to hold on until help arrives.

Cell Me On It

I am so happy that President Obama is going to overturn the Bush-era ban on federal funding for embryonic stem cell research. His decision (which he is expected to announce Monday, March 9, 2009) will reverse an executive order signed by Bush in 2001 that restricted federal funding to a small number of stem cell lines already in existence. The reversal will not allow the use of federal money for the creation of new stem cell lines, but will permit scientists who work with newer stem cell lines to apply for Government funding for their research.

I am glad that science is now coming to the forefront again. It feels like we have been at a stand-still in medical advancement for eight years now, it really is time for a change. I don't support stuff like cloning or genetically changing your baby's eye color before it is born, but I do support stem cell research because it is a move that could potentially open pathways for new cures for serious diseases and ailments like diabetes, Alzheimer's, cancer, heart disease, strokes, and so many more. This type of research holds the power to improve the quality of lives for so many people and may even increase the life expectancy of people. Of course there is a lot of backlash coming from the anti-abortionists and religious organizations who view embryonic stem cell research as an homicidal act. They argue that adult stem cells should be used instead.

Research using adult stem cells already have about a 20 year jump on embryonic stem cell research. Potential treatments have thus already advanced to the human trial stage. However, adult cells are limited in their flexibility and only have the potential to develop into a few of the cell types. Embryonic cells on the other hand, can develop into over 220 types of human cells. One embryonic stem can provide an endless supply of cells with defined characteristics. Adult cells do not live as long as embryonic cells in culture. It can also more difficult to obtain adult cells in large quantities for research purposes.

I personally believe that a embryo has the POTENTIAL to DEVELOP into a human being but isn't a human being by itself. A lot of pro-lifers believe that human life in the form of an ovum and spermatozoon are a human from the very moment of fertilization. A stem cell is just a "blank" cell if you will, that is capable of becoming another more differentiated cell type in the body like a skin cell, a muscle cell, nerve cell, etc. Their microscopic in size and are big news in the medical world because they can be used to replace or heal damages cells. Kind of like a built-in repair system for the human body that will replenish the body with healthy cells. With the support of 70% of Americans and our President, I think that stem cell research has a great chance to help so many people and their families; I am all for it.

Bumming Out

So here I am on the second to last day of my Spring Break (and the eve of daylight savings time...boo. Gabby loses an hour of sleep) and I am writing about how I am more than a little bummed about my GRE score: 760. I will obviously have to take it again, but not for awhile. I need to refuel. The study books and prep classes and CD-Roms don't do shit to prepare you for what is on the test. The math is especially crazy. That was like astronaut math...no one knows that stuff, except astronauts that is. It wasn't even math you learn in college classes. On well, it was a good experience and I now know what to expect next time. I also should get started on this damn senior dissertation I have to write to fucking graduate. I am pissed about that. Clearly, they have confused a B.A. for an M.A.

It's Bike Week here in Florida and the roars of motorcycle engines revving up can be heard for miles around. I hate Bike Week. A lot of people would argue that it is good for the economy and brings tourism to the area. Like we need more tourists lol. This is Florida people. Mickey Mouse and Shamu bring all the tourism we need. And let's not even get me started on NASA at the Cape. The Space Program is almost as worthless as Bike Week. I am so glad that President Obama is not funding it past 2010. It is a giant waste of billions of tax payer money. There is nothing out there...that is why it's called Space. We can't live out there and there is nothing useful out there. Earth is the only planet humans should be concerned about and maintaining. Who knows, spaceships are probably partly to blame for destroying the ozone layer and global warming...all that bad fuel they burn entering and leaving the Earth's atmosphere. It's not like the Government would have admitted to it since their the ones who have been funding it.

Anyways, Bike Week brings the undesirables to town. Skull heads. I know that sounds stereotypical but it really is true. Not all of them are like that but however most of them look like they came straight out of a Hellraiser Biker film. Not at all pleasing. Bike Week is also dangerous and a lot of them get killed or cause wrecks and alcohol is involved 9 times out of 10. The city allows, EVEN welcomes Bike Week each year but discourages Black College Reunion. No one usually dies, it doesn't last a whole week but just a weekend, and it used to bring in as much as Bike Week before Daytona started trying to do away with it and other surrounding cities began to follow suit. Clearly, race is the underling factor here. Oh, and white college spring break is still welcomed with open arms too.

Tweet Tweet

Tomorrow I take the GRE test for grad school admission. I am hoping to get a good enough score to be admitted into George Washington University in D.C. I am kinda nervous but I am ready to go and do it to get it over and done with. I swear, if I could jump up right now and go take the test at 11pm in my jammies, I would. That is how badly I want to get past this hurdle. I have been trying to relax and have been watching episodes of CSI:NY online tonight. I love that show. I also got a twitter today which is kinda cool. I usually just referred to it as stalker but now I see it's not AS creepy as I thought it would be. My little sis turned me on to it. You know me, always gotta be in the loop. My little url is www.twitter.com/glamalicious if anybody is interested. I am following like nine peeps right now. President Barack Obama, Hill Harper, Jane Fonda, Bill Gates, Diablo Cody, Britney Spears, Perez Hilton, CNN,...and some other person who I think is important lol. Anyways, not much else I feel like blogging about right now, so I am going to log off now and call it a night pretty soon.

xoxox,
Gabby

I'm Mrs. Extra Extra This Just In

Ever since I was young, I have always loved to talk and have people listen to me. I love to talk about myself (I know that seems a bit vain but it's true): my experiences, my future plans and dreams, my fears, my family, my loves and hates, and my hopes. I am a master with words and expressing myself. I can do anything from speaking in front of people and giving presentations to blogging online and writing short stories. I even gave a speech at my high school graduation. I love being able to communicate my thoughts and feelings with others. Yeah, I'm a journalist and a reporter. Ireport and write about issues close to my heart and that affect me. I talk about what I love. I am so thankful for this gift that God has blessed me with. I have the gift of gab and the stage presence to back it up. I wrote this blog because sometimes we tend to get so caught up in what we don't have or wish we did have, that we totally forget about all the beautiful gifts and talents God has put within each one of us. ENVY NO ONE because you have something about you that is unique; so take that thing and nuture it, build upon it, and use it to show everyone how amazing it is to be you.

Like What

Okay so in my about me and profile I list all the things I love and enjoy, but I don't talk too much about my pet peeves; I do mention I hate racism though. Racism is more of a hatred than just a pet peeve or vexation, do to some very bad past experiences. Anyway, I am going to dedicate this blog to the rest of the stuff I find annoying =-)

1.) I find it so aggravating to be told I look like someone else.
Reason: I don't look like anyone other than Gabrielle....which is who I am supposed to look like. I remember once someone told me that I looked like Star Jones.... Now, I have nothing against Ms. Jones, but c'mon, the lady is like 50 and I don't look ANYTHING like her. Someone else once told me I looked like Gabrielle Union (I think they just said that because we share the same name because I saw no resemblance between us) which wasn't so bad, but I just hate being told I look like other people period. I am an original so I look like only me. So unless you are telling me I resemble one of my parents, (which is understandable since I came from them) keep it to yourself.

2.) I don't like to go grocery shopping (love to eat but not shop for the food).
Reason: It sucks out loud to have to go into a freezing cold grocery store (it always feels like 20 below in the grocery store and always smells like celery), fight crowds, squeeze past people down the aisles with your cart (the aisles never seem wide enough do they?), and then you have to stand in a long line to check out (unless you're shopping in Walmart Supercentre at 3am, which I have done before and there were no long lines...not surprisingly). They never seem to have enough lanes open...and the other employees will see that another line needs to be opened but instead will just walk right by and pretend like everything is fine. That always leaves me fuming. Then inevitably, you get home and realize you've still forgotten to get something...

3.) I don't care for going to the dentist.
Reason: I go to the dentist every 6 months to get my teeth cleaned as recommended by the ADA, but the smells and sounds (and not to mention the taste of the tools and stuff they use in my mouth) completely nauseate me.

4.) Bra Shopping is so annoying.
Reason: It takes a whole damn day going from store to store, trying on all different cuts and sizes of bras just to find that one that 'almost' fits perfectly.

5.) I always want to bitch slap rude, really arrogant, and fake lying ass people.
Reason: Self-explanatory.

6.) It really annoys me when a d.j. on the radio talks over a song I am trying to listen to.
Reason: They get paid to play the music that people want to hear, not talk over the beginning or the almost end of a song. When I listen to a song I want to hear ALL of it, not just the parts you (the d.j.) feel are the most important.

7.) It really bugs me when the light turns yellow and I speed up to try to beat the red light, but the asshole in front me stops when we both could have easily made the light.
Reason: Because I don't like it when people don't know how to drive. If the light just turned yellow and you're less than 5 yards from it then you can keep going....asshole.

8.) It really bothers me when people who know nothing about politics try to comment on politics and political affairs.
Reason: Most people only want to talk about politics every four years, so as a result they know little or nothing about how politics operates. They end up making off base or extremely ignorant comments based on stuff they have heard from watching like 10 minutes of Fox News every night. If you don't have all your facts straight then quit trying to sound smart.

9.) I wonder why telemarketers keep calling your cell and house even after you have hung up on them and cursed them out so many times in the past? They must be extremely resilient people.
Reason: Telemarketers bug me because, if I want a service, a new type of credit card or a trip somewhere or a toaster that works under water, I will go out and get it myself. I don't need you calling me 5 times a week and asking me. I wonder why they keep calling. Even telemarketers from the same company will call me after I have expressed the fact that I don't want to ever speak with them or anyone else from their "company" again. You would think that they would leave each other helpful little notes outside the margin beside numbers where they have had bad experiences to warn their co-workers. "Note: 551-0097-7860= crazy, screaming lady. Call at your own risk. It could be hazardous to your hearing though."

10.) I don't care for junk mail or spam.
Reason: They lie, or are computer viruses of some sort, they are pointless, the ones that come through the mail are a waste of trees.

11.) I wish guys wouldn't try to hit on me with me cheesy or lame pick-up lines.
Reason: I am a grade A chick so when you talk to me you need to bring your A game. Oh, and fellas, if you make eye contact with me and I don't return the look of interest, but rather put my head down and pretend to look busy, or start rummaging through my bag...don't bother approaching me. I am most likely not going to be interested in anything you have to say...I will probably even end up hating you for it. Real talk.

Best Days of Your Life

"Cuz I'll be there in the back of your mind, from the day we met to you making me cry. And it's just too bad, you've already had the best days of your life." That is a line from Best Days of Your Life, one of my favorite songs by Kellie Pickler. This line describes how I feel about my ex. I know he misses me and all the little things I did. I was the best damn girlfriend. No lie. I was always there for him. Whether it was financial, emotional, or mental support he needed, I was always there to supply him with it. I would drop everything and make him the center of my world. I guess that is why things didn't work out lol. His reason for breaking up with me was that I was too perfect and he didn't want us to wind up walking down the aisle before we were 21. Excuse me, but isn't the point of dating to try to find the perfect person so you can get married and spend the rest of your life with them? Guess not to him. I was the best damn girlfriend...and got screwed over because of it. And the thing is, he still calls me all the time wanting to hang out and know what I'm up to, still talks to me about all his problems, and still drives and hour to my parents' home just to see me on weekends.....so why not just keep dating me? Lol, I will never get some people. We've been broken up for a little over 2 years now and mutual friends of ours still tell me things that he has said to them along the lines of how he thinks that breaking up with me might have been a mistake, he knows he's never going to find anyone else to do all the stuff for him that I did, and he misses me....duh. While he was figuring all this stuff that I already knew, I was busy getting over him. I don't want him back anymore. Somewhere out there, I believe there is a man with some sense who won't mind me being 'too perfect' for him and will appreciate me and all I will do for him. One thing I did learn from this experience is to never make anyone a priority when is all you are to them is an option. Now, I am out on the dating scene again exploring my options.

Here's the Kellie Pickler Song Best Days of Your Life link:

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=62796960

And Somedays...

Oh, don't you just hate those days when it seems like eveything is going wrong, nothing is going to ever change, no one understands, you're always going to be sad and unhappy, and despite all your efforts...you just can't seem to do anything right. Those days when you feel like you have no control over anything and you just want to lie down somewhere and cry your eyes out have a purpose: they show us how strong we are and will make it that much easier for us to appreciate life when things are right. You just have to keep going, grit your teeth and make it through the dark tunnel to the sunshine on the other side. Remember, when we have nothing else, we have hope and faith to keep us going.

Build Yourself

I am sure that most everyone, if not everyone, has body issues. I know I do. Even a person with high self-esteem and confidence will have those days where they look in the mirror and critique their bodies. "I wish my nose was little thinner." "If my breasts were just a little more symmetrical." "I would look perfect if I could just have more defined calves." And so it goes. Like I have mentioned before, I watch a lot of reality TV and documentaries. Well, I was watching one of their shows on plastic surgery that show on the Discovery Health Channel...I think it was Before And After...anyways, it was at the part where the doctor was rattling off all the possibilities of what could go wrong, complications that could arise, and the general risks of the surgery, that I began to ask myself, "Why would anyone go through that much trouble for a surgery that they don't technically need?" Most of the people on these people already look great or really good by societal standards.

I could definitely understand having plastic surgery to correct some deformity or to save your life, but why on Earth risk your life for vain reasons? It's a matter of personal choice I know, but aren't our personal feelings and opinions of beauty a reflection of society and the media have told us? So is personal choice really an individual's choice or the media's? Do people who have plastic surgery to 'better' their looks and be more attractive do it for themself? My guess is no. Saying a comment like, "Fuller breasts will give me more confidence and a better lease on life," is an individual acknowledging that they think that if they get breasts augmentation then they will be treated better and will look more attractive to others which in turn will make feel better about themselves. I for one, think it's sad that people have been so brainwashed that they are willing to undergo major surgery just to "fit in." Where are peoples' backbone today?!

I am sure we have all seen those people who get a little too carried with the plastic surgery and end up looking like something straight out of a horror scene, or at best, they have their friends, associates, and family say things like "She looked better before the surgery," about them behind their backs because no person who cares about you would dare say that to your face after you have spent so much money on looking worse than you originally did.

I believe God makes our body look the way it does for a reason, so I am just going to be happy with what I've got and age gracefully naturally.

EAT ME!

So here's the deal: I have been on a diet for about 8 months now and I have loss over 40lbs. Yay! I am so proud of myself and my progress. Although no one could tell it, I weighed 279 lbs. at my heaviest. Whenever I tell people that (people like those who have always known me), they are so surprised and say things like, "I would have never guessed you weighed that much," or my favorite, "You certainly didn't look it." God blessed me with a very well proportioned body. Even though I have always been a thick chick, I have never been that FAT chick.

I decided I wanted to lose weight last summer when I had my first ever anxiety attack. It was so scary that I rushed myself to the hospital (yes, I did drive myself lol)....twice. Even though there was nothing physically wrong with me (thank God), I saw first hand the effect that stress, poor eating habits, lack of exercise, and extensive worrying can have on your mental and physical health. I then started to exercise, eat right, and visit a Bariatric center (weight loss center). I also get special shots from there that help my body's metabolism burn more calories. Don't worry, they're completely safe and my doctor is great and I always research EVERYTHING before I do anything. It's not like something from those seemingly shady weight loss infomercials you see on the tv late at night.

I am on a 1,200 calorie a day plan. It isn't too hard to stick to because I get to eat every four hours (as long as I make sure that I stick to the 1,200). I eat my one egg, two strip turkey bacon, and St. Thomas English Muffin breakfast or oatmeal or Raisin Bran. I eat again four hours later but this time only one of my snacks (i.e. fruit, rice cake, veggies). Then I eat my lunch/brunch about four hours later which is usually a Healthy Choice or Lean Cuisine Meal. Then I snack on healthy stuff, then dinner (another Lean Cuisine). I snack four hours later on more veggies and fruit (free food=no cals). I don't always eat Healthy Choice and Lean Cuisine. Sometimes I eat my mom's cooking or I eat out, but I just have to make sure I portion it out right so I can stick to my calorie count=) However, most days, my diet does consist of the regiment above. Oh, and I haven't had salt or soda since last summer either. Salt leads to water retention and soda is just bad for anxiety. Now, I am human, and I do mess up a little sometimes. It always seems to be my sweet tooth that does me in lol. Those sweets always seem to scream, "Eat Me!" when I'm trying the most to be good. I love chocolate and ice-cream, so sometimes I eat a little f that bad stuff and try to make it up the next day with some extra exercise or eating a little more veggies. *Gabe smiles and looks up sheepishly* What is good though for the sweet tooth are smart ones desserts in your grocer's frozen food section. They're like only 150 cals.

Overall, I feel I have done amazingly well (I have even surprised myself with how well I have been doing) and I also believe that I will reach my goal of 160 lbs. before August of this year. I'll keep ya posted babes.

Lions, Tigers, and Bears! Oh My!

Okay, I am a bit of a reality TV junkie. I watch everything from the now in syndication Fear Factor to America's Next Top Model to my favorite, MTV's 'The Hills.' I also love House Hunters, Man vs. Wild, Solitary (really cool show about how humans react when isolated and under stress), Survivor Man, Caught on Tape, Busted on the Job, Cops, Speeders, Myth Busters, Man vs. Food, etc. I know that some aspects of 'reality TV' are obviously not so real. Sometimes things are staged, pre-written, pre-determined, pre-tested, scripted, etc. However, for the most part, a good portion of it is actually live and real.

I was watching Cops on the boob tube last night when I began to wonder what our elders must make of all this so-called 'reality' TV nonsense. Isn't the whole point of television (besides keeping you informed via news stations) to escape reality for a few hours. For example, if you were say a cop, when you come home after a long, hard day on the job, do you really want to see on your television what you were just out battling less than an hour ago? The answer is probably no. The same thing is probably true if you're an educator like a teacher or principle. After a long day at school do you really want to come home and see 'The Principle's Office ( This is a relatively new reality show that with each episode, follows different school principles to see how they govern their school and deal with various issues that arise within their school. The show also follows various disciplinary issues at each school so viewers can see how they unfold)?

Back in our grand parents and great grandparents' time, when all people had to listen to was the radio with their little commercials, story lines, news, and special broad castings, there was no such thing as reality radio (except maybe the news), where some person came on the radio and told listeners about people being in simulated real situations. When the television appeared on the scene, people would come home and relax on the couch to watch fun and family oriented shows like Leave it to Beaver, I Love Lucy, The Andy Griffith Show, and so on. Shows where your mind could rest and relax and just enjoy....not where you were constantly wondering things like: "What was he thinking?" "Why did she say that?" "OMG!?" "Did they really just eat a mouth full of slugs?!" "This guy must be crazy to do this even for money."

I have to wonder sometimes, are really missing the point of the television and it's purpose?