In light of recent violent incidents on the news and other confusing issues related to values in my own life, I have been wondering lately, are there really good and bad people in the world? Or are there just people who get into situations and handle them either poorly or correctly? That last suggestion has been making more and more sense to me these last couple of months. To be honest, when the idea of there not being bad people or good people just people in situations was first suggested to me by a former colleague of mine, I thought it was complete rubbish.
But the more I have been thinking about it lately, maybe there is some validity to it. Maybe that is why the friends and family of people who commit heinous crimes can say that the person is usually kind, sweet, nice, a good person, etc. Maybe the friends and family weren't there to observe the person while they were going through a rough time or a bad situation.
For example, let's look at the accused Ft. Hood gunman, Major Nidal Hasan, by all accounts from his family and close friends he was a stand up guy who was usually mild-mannered and polite. So what could make him do something so terribly out of his character as to kill 13 fellow soldiers? There have been numerous reports that said that Hasan was being...harassed if you will, because of his religion or views on Islam. Maybe his family and friends didn't see the toll that this situation was putting on Hasan? Maybe the situation pushed him too far? Maybe he was a good guy in a bad situation who lacked the proper social skills to cope with conflict?
In NO WAY am I taking up for what he did. It was a very disgraceful, hateful, hurtful, terrible, and destructive act. I have family serving in the armed forces so I was shocked and emotional hurt by the Ft. Hood incident. I am just someone who thinks a lot and tries to look at all angles and sides of an issue before I make my final judgement. It just seems that if people were either good or bad by design then we should be able to spot the bad apples sooner (i.e. before they commit a mass killing) since they would have always been doing bad deeds.
Let's look at a more mild scenario, a loyal wife and friend who happens to cheat on her husband. She's been emotionally and physically loyal to him for say 10 years, but then he gets a new job that requires him to travel and not be home as often. The wife gets lonely feeling more emotionally and physically distant from her husband, and looks for some extra companionship. You can't argue she was always a slut because she has obviously been loyal to him for 10 years. Is the situation to blame here? Maybe she wouldn't have had an affair if her husband hadn't gotten the new job that keeps him away a lot? Someone certainly could make that argument.
I mean, it's no secret that things that happen to us in our life sometimes change who we are and how we react to the world around us. A woman who repeatedly gets cheated on by men she dates might learn to not trust men, and therefore become a person who is more doubtful of others and their intentions. A person who was once optimistic about the world and life might have a change of heart after a very bad or traumatic event takes place in their life. They could become a very cynical individual. I know I have had situations and experiences change me, and I have seen it happen to others countless times. But could a situation really change someone enough to where it could make them kill? And if so, are we all just a negative interaction or bad circumstance away from becoming someone we would never want to be?
I am still not 100% sure of this theory about situations determining a person's behavior rather than vice versa. But it is definitely worth thinking about so I am putting it out here to you all.
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